Key Issues

Tossin' and Turnin'

I was having trouble sleeping last night. I blame blogworld.

So I lay in bed on my side and stared at my snoring husband.

My orange tabby, typically a lazy bum, was restless as well. She was on the prowl. She furtively traced the perimeter of the bed, jumped up, then continued her pace.

Something to do, something to do...(how nice it must be to sleep all day and play all night.)

I felt little paws start at my ankle and walk themselves up and over my back, and when she came into view again, she had lowered to a haunched slink. Prowl, indeed...

She made her way to Shrek's the husband's pillow, where she employed every ounce of her grace and stealth as she positioned herself adjacent his head.

As this is atypical behavior for my beloved pet, I watched with increasing curiosity as she put her face to his, nose to nose. I'm convinced that she held her breath, as he had no knowledge of her presence. Satisfied, she pulled back a centimeter or so before releasing the sandpapery tongue upon her prey.

She unloaded half a dozen fast and furious licks upon the end of his nose before the assault registered and a dazed, confused, and angry ogre husband with squinted eyes and spiked hair, jolted upright and tried to focus on the source of his sleep disruption.

He failed of course, rolled over, and drifted off as his evil wife cackled in the background.

Heh. The things that amuse me at 2am...