Observations by Key Monroe~~Home of Right Opinions, Cynical Viewpoints, and TMI in Hefty Doses
|E-mail: keymonroe [at] alltel [dot] net

May 05, 2004

Before I abandon the Penis topic completely...

I just have one question:

How come you fellas out there give us absolute hell if we want to obsess over the size of our boobs, thighs, feet, whatever...yet it's okay for you to obsess over the size of your "manhood"?

If you can't answer the question, just admit to the double standard, and we'll call it a night.

posted by Key on 11:30 PM | Comments (17)
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That's easy...it's 40 lbs. of meat and a bucket of balls...and it ain't "manhood"...it's a Johnson!!!


Posted by: Sam at May 6, 2004 12:06 AM

Because you women have control over whether us guys get laid or not, so our only defense is to tease you when you obsess...

At least, that's the way it seems to me.

Posted by: Jack at May 6, 2004 07:54 AM

Whatever gave you the idea that we obsess over the size ? I prefer to obsess on what I can do with it.

Posted by: Sandcrab at May 6, 2004 05:04 PM

Because if you DIDN'T obsess over the size, these stupid spammers would be out of business.

But, yes, I'll buy that you're also obsessed with what you can do with it.

Jack - I like that you think that. But I'm afraid that we are not in complete control. See, if you guys don't want to cooperate, there's not a whole lot that we can do to "force" the issue.

Posted by: Key at May 6, 2004 05:42 PM

Ok I confess, I have in the past wanted to put old dead John Holmes to shame. But alas,nothing works, I suspect it is the same people that sold all that breast cream and wrinkle remover. So I am stuck with what I have, forever to be dammned because I can't satisfy a woman with out my dream weapon. How come there are no ugly women in soap operas, do they all live around here?

Posted by: James Old Guy at May 6, 2004 07:48 PM

A guy who "doesn't want to cooperate" is either dead or has a damn good reason for not "cooperating" (like being dead or married to someone else, the two best reasons I can think of in my current state of fully enjoying French wine).

Hmmmm.... unless I have an abnormally high sex drive. Geez, I'll be 40 in 7 months, you'd think I'd be well on the "off-ramp" by now...

Ummm... perhaps too much information there.


Posted by: Jack at May 6, 2004 11:01 PM

That's okay, Jack. TMI is part of my creed.

How about fatigue? Is that a valid excuse?

Posted by: Key at May 6, 2004 11:17 PM

..no complaints so far... but, what you suggest would be giving too much of the game away.. I prefer to wait for the gasps of delight.. or the giggles.. either way, Petey is happy... and, when he's happy... so.am.I....

...I don't obsess, I let them do that...

Posted by: Eric at May 6, 2004 11:39 PM

I don't obsess about things I can't change.

Posted by: CW at May 7, 2004 02:22 AM

Hey, I'm proud of my three inches!

Posted by: Denny at May 7, 2004 04:21 AM

Way too much information Denny. Now we know why you're so grouchy.

Posted by: Jesse at May 7, 2004 05:09 PM

Fatigue, Key? It's never stopped me. I've said, "Don't expect me to be all energetic, but I'll be happy to play along."

But then again... that's just me.

Posted by: Jack at May 7, 2004 06:54 PM

Yeah, yeah.

It's part of your make-up; you have to SAY that...

...and I have no way of calling you on it.

I'm sure everyone cries fatigue every now and then. *sigh* I think I've even done so on occasion.

Posted by: Key at May 7, 2004 11:00 PM

I, for one, don't obsess over the size of my penis. I obsess over the size of your breasts.

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