Observations by Key Monroe~~Home of Right Opinions, Cynical Viewpoints, and TMI in Hefty Doses
|E-mail: keymonroe [at] alltel [dot] net

November 15, 2004

Thanks Fellas

If only I had more time to play on the internet...If only I could get DSL at home, I would no doubt devote each and every weekend to this noble sport.

Alas...as this is not the case, I sincerely thank Velocimaster and my Mystery Guest Blogger for keeping my lonely blog company over the weekend.

Perhaps, should they choose to continue the trend, they can prevent my weekend hits from plunging into the teens, thereby screwing up my averages in the days to follow...at least that would be my line of thinking were I a hit-counter, which I'm not...not that there's anything wrong with that.

MGB, I laughed and I cried. Truly no one has ever dedicated such a tribute on my behalf. But don't think that I don't get your aim. You mean to inflate the expectations of those who have not yet met me, no? Yeah, that's the ticket. Then, when they do meet me, the disappointment will be tangible.

Shrewd. Still, next time I'm right and you are so terribly wrong, I will go easy on you. You've earned that much. Maybe I'll even let you win one.

But, in the effort of honesty, I must set the record straight. This is what I look like. Not only that, but my skin and my tan have run off together. I need new ones.

Also, I will be giving up the following things for Lent:

caffeine, alcohol, sprouts, half-rubber, toking, rolling, geeking, flirting, exercising, and swallowing.

The last two are stellar sacrifices on my part, therefore I see no reason to further torture myself by giving up my chocolate...nor my boy toys.

(Understand that this list is preliminary. I still have a few months to tweak out the kinks.)

posted by Key on 08:19 PM | Comments (8)

Hi! I came over from SWG, after reading your comment on the goat...warped curiousity lead me to wanting to read more about the dysfunctional family :) Anyway...I wanted to say hello as I peruse! :)

Posted by: Sheilah at November 15, 2004 09:52 PM

Oh, you like a good train wreck?? I'll see what I can do. (Surely I can come up with something that I can divulge...)

Posted by: Key at November 15, 2004 09:58 PM

You would give up half-rubber for Lent? That would be a sin of the first magnitude. Your call, just saying I'm sitting at least three lightning bolts away from you when you do.

Posted by: Velociman at November 16, 2004 12:21 AM

WHATEVER you do...don't give up the sprouts!!!


Posted by: Sam at November 16, 2004 01:36 AM

Dang. Whose ass does a girl have to kiss to get signed up for that kind of guest-blogging service, anyway...? That was great!

As for Lent, my dear...I'd leave it at sprouts and geeking and call it a day. Everything else (what is this Half-Rub-ber of which you speak??) is too elemental to live without...

Posted by: Queenie at November 16, 2004 03:03 AM

Queenie, I would ask for your keys so that we could all invade your site, but you are kicking ass over there! Why mess with perfection??

Velocigod, I have been humbled. Please do not smite me. I will half your rubber anytime. ; )

Posted by: Key at November 16, 2004 04:08 AM

If you're planning on tweaking your list, you'll need to either take caffeine off of your list, or admit that you'll have to give up chocolate, since it contains caffeine.

Posted by: Samira at November 22, 2004 09:05 PM


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